I was shocked, confused, and bewildered
as I walked through Heaven's door.
Not by the beauty of it all its splendor,
nor by its lights, or its decor. -
But it was all the folks in Heaven
who caused my teeth to gnash.
I saw thieves, deceivers, and sinners,
I saw alcoholics, and lots of white trash... -
Why, there stood the kid from seventh grade,
who swiped my lunch money twice!
Next to him stood my old neighbor,
who never did said anything nice. -
Bert, who I’d always thought
would be sure to rot in hell,
was sitting pretty on a heavenly cloud,
and he looked incredibly well. -
I nudged Jesus, and asked, "Hey, what's the deal?
I would love to hear your take.
How'd all these sinners get up in here?
You must have made a mistake. -
"And why is everyone so quiet? And so somber?
Can’t you give me just one clue?"
"Hush, my child," He said, "They're all in shock.
They didn't expect to be seeing you."
- Anonymous, and modified by Bud Jenness
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